Because he is a thoughtful and caring husband, Mike got us tickets to see The Crucible for absolutely no reason. We saw the show on Friday and emotions were running high. First of all, Saoirse Ronan played Abigail Williams and I had completely forgotten from highschool how much that character is the worst. She is absolutely the height of awfulness. Saoirse Ronan (or, as Mike thought it was, Sasha Rowan) was fantastic and made me hate the character as you’re meant to.
When the end of the show came it was almost a relief because it just kept getting more and more intense. I was just sitting in the audience hating EVERY PURITANICAL JUDGY SALEM MONSTER through the whole show and wanting John and Elizabeth Proctor to run away to the future. So thank you, Mike, for a high stakes and intellectual date night.
On Saturday, I was an idiot. We went to Blackbird’s with Sofia to watch the basketball games and goof off as usual. As is typical with Sofia, we had the time of our lives. As I am wont to do after a night of drinking, I decided to run all the way home and, like a complete and utter Long Island iced tea consuming buffoon, I dropped my phone on the street and shattered the screen. So now I can’t even look at it because it’s a mark of my shame and irresponsibility even though I’m 27 years old and am capable of operating a slow cooker and keeping a pet alive. So now I have to just live my life on the edge knowing that I have to risk getting shards of glass in my face when I talk on the phone. That is the price I must pay. And also $230 because that’s the price of fixing a shattered screen.
Be better than me, world. Be better.